Streets of Joburg
People say many things about the streets of Joburg... the crime, the traffic... After almost one year living in Joburg, I must admit, it's still as entertaining if not frustrating as Day 1.
I mean there are the forever frustrating & annoying traffic jams. What does it matter whether it's peak or off-peak traffic?! Then you get the frequent "load-shedding", which means Joburgers lose all ability to obey simple traffic rules, because there are no robots. Thanks to the Outsurance point-men, at least there is some light at the end of the tunnel.
The new addition to the streets of Joburg would be none but the unavoidable pot holes. One would mistakenly think that they are in the roughest roller coaster ride in an amusement park, unfortunately there's nothing amusing about it. There was a report of some 1,000 pot holes in Joburg, after months of non-stop rain.
If you think that's bad enough, let's not forget the hard working, law enforcing JMPD. Lucky for you if you run into them, because you can either spend a lovely weekend behind bars or get a hefty fine. But there are always rooms for negotiation, Christmas gifts during December, coke/ice cream during summer, there are various things the officers need and the public is there to provide. Just remember to be discreet about it... though one can never tell whether you or the cop should be the discreet one.
Then again you can always count on the guys who are convinced that they are Tom Cruise in Days of Thunder or Vin Diesel in the Fast & the Furious, who would pull some crazy maneuver on you. Zig zagging through traffic is just the norm, the goal is to get ahead! You snooze, you loose. And the most ardent believers of this game are no doubt the taxi drivers. But don't blame them, because they are just trying to get you to your destination on time... never mind if you don't reach there in one piece.
All is good on the streets of Joburg. If the above "disadvantages" puts more pressure on our already strenuous lives... no worries! Because there are the forever entertaining street acts! You'll find them on almost every major intersections: the leading the blind-man act, the fake-a-limp act, the safe the environment-I'll bag whatever I can act, the silent comedian act a.k.a. give me money & I'll make you laugh act, and there is the age old classic - "My donkey was arrested... 3 wives & 10 children to feed" - sign board act!
Recently I saw, by far, the best street act so far. Trust me, if there was an academy award for street acts, this guy would win it! It was a normal working day, I was taking my 10 deep calming breaths before hitting the major traffic, when I saw... A man dressed in a red flowery DRESS! Yes, the same one that Eddie Murphy wore in the Big Mamma's House. To top it off, he had his hair straightened (he could be wearing a wig). This "lady" casually strolled up and down the road with her fashionable "black plastic" chatting to eligible bachelors for a few rands. And to make it more convincing, he twirled his hair like a girl. Now, doesn't that deserve an award?!
So, for whatever people say about the streets of Joburg, you can't deny that it maybe the little entertainment that Joburgers get to have in their crazy schedules.
I mean there are the forever frustrating & annoying traffic jams. What does it matter whether it's peak or off-peak traffic?! Then you get the frequent "load-shedding", which means Joburgers lose all ability to obey simple traffic rules, because there are no robots. Thanks to the Outsurance point-men, at least there is some light at the end of the tunnel.
The new addition to the streets of Joburg would be none but the unavoidable pot holes. One would mistakenly think that they are in the roughest roller coaster ride in an amusement park, unfortunately there's nothing amusing about it. There was a report of some 1,000 pot holes in Joburg, after months of non-stop rain.
If you think that's bad enough, let's not forget the hard working, law enforcing JMPD. Lucky for you if you run into them, because you can either spend a lovely weekend behind bars or get a hefty fine. But there are always rooms for negotiation, Christmas gifts during December, coke/ice cream during summer, there are various things the officers need and the public is there to provide. Just remember to be discreet about it... though one can never tell whether you or the cop should be the discreet one.
Then again you can always count on the guys who are convinced that they are Tom Cruise in Days of Thunder or Vin Diesel in the Fast & the Furious, who would pull some crazy maneuver on you. Zig zagging through traffic is just the norm, the goal is to get ahead! You snooze, you loose. And the most ardent believers of this game are no doubt the taxi drivers. But don't blame them, because they are just trying to get you to your destination on time... never mind if you don't reach there in one piece.
All is good on the streets of Joburg. If the above "disadvantages" puts more pressure on our already strenuous lives... no worries! Because there are the forever entertaining street acts! You'll find them on almost every major intersections: the leading the blind-man act, the fake-a-limp act, the safe the environment-I'll bag whatever I can act, the silent comedian act a.k.a. give me money & I'll make you laugh act, and there is the age old classic - "My donkey was arrested... 3 wives & 10 children to feed" - sign board act!
Recently I saw, by far, the best street act so far. Trust me, if there was an academy award for street acts, this guy would win it! It was a normal working day, I was taking my 10 deep calming breaths before hitting the major traffic, when I saw... A man dressed in a red flowery DRESS! Yes, the same one that Eddie Murphy wore in the Big Mamma's House. To top it off, he had his hair straightened (he could be wearing a wig). This "lady" casually strolled up and down the road with her fashionable "black plastic" chatting to eligible bachelors for a few rands. And to make it more convincing, he twirled his hair like a girl. Now, doesn't that deserve an award?!
So, for whatever people say about the streets of Joburg, you can't deny that it maybe the little entertainment that Joburgers get to have in their crazy schedules.
Labels: South Africa
posted by jule at
4:53 AM
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